It’s hot, my days are usually some shade of chaotic, and I am responsible for raising almost $1 million for a nonprofit social services agency in Elkhart, Indiana this year. This when, according to President Obama on his last visit to our county, we have, even more than most other places in the country, been hit by a perfect economic storm. Oh, and I have no clue what my life will look like in six months – but hoo boy, I am fully alive.
Given the fact that my husband died in December, it feels weird and yet wonderful to say that. Today for the first time in I don’t know how long, I began the day by answering “I’m fantastic!” when people asked how I was. Joy comes in the morning, even after the darkest nights of our souls.
Still, sorrow does sweep in sometimes. Today I also had to say goodby to the development associate who has graced my working days for the last eight months and who is moving on to attend seminary. Her name is Anna Ruth and I honestly don’t know what I will do without her strengths and without the light and warmth and — Anna Ruth-ness — that she’s shed abroad in our office. But the pain of goodbys is also part of being fully alive. It’s part of the deal.
So, onward.
August 14, 2009 at 10:01 pm
None of us know what our lives are going to look like in six months, if we’re honest. Most of the time we don’t acknowledge it, though.
I’m glad you’ve posted again.
August 14, 2009 at 10:12 pm
You’re right, Lisa, of course. And maybe it’s a good thing that we don’t. Keeps us “loose,” I suspect.
I’m going to try.